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As far as movies are concerned you could see Wild Things or Cruel Intentions. As far as well filmed and acted lesbian scenes, check out any of the L Word seasons. There are always some really great scenes and they are true to lesbian life.
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Requiem for a Dream (2000) features, "a nasty, extremely graphic lesbian orgy scene with a shared anal dildo..." I've seen this movie, but for the life of me I can't remember a graphic lesbian orgy scene. Which means I probably saw the censored version and didn't even realize it.
If you want to see the entire, uncensored movie, you'll have to rent the NC-17 version (it could also be called the "Unrated" version), not the rated R version.
There's also a lesbian oral sex scene in Boys Don't Cry (1999). It's "implied" oral sex, though, nothing graphic. Also, I'm not sure it can technically be called a lesbian oral sex scene, because one of the characters (Hilary Swank's character, the main character) is transgender, not lesbian. They are not quite the same thing.
You might also find more of what you're looking for at the Related Link below, "Most Controversial Films of All Time."