How can you live with your dad when your mom won't let you?

Answer 1

I know that it has to be very hard on you to have both your parents split from each other. Mothers have a tough time raising their kids. You won't know that until you become a parent yourself and then you'll be ready to give your mother a medal.

Kids never truly see what actually goes on between their parents as they view their parents as just "parents" and not just human beings like everyone else. Things happen to a couple. Sometimes people just fall out of love and really were never meant to be together; other times it could be the father or mother who had an affair with someone else or they simply just ran away from their responsibilities of being their for the wife/husband, children and home. There are so many variations of why two people split up.

If your mom is fairly kind to you and she is setting down some hard rules around there such as:

Doing your homework without fail Getting good grades Where you are when you are out Who you are out with Not allowing your friends to call late at night Not allowing you to do alcohol or drugs Not allowing you to go to every party you may want to go too Being respectful of others Doing chores around the house such as dishes, keeping your room clean, etc.

This is normal and it's fair! Your mother could use all the help you can give. If she isn't always fighting with you and just setting down some rules then you have it pretty good. If you should manage to go live with your father don't think things will be much better. Either your father will set down some rules at his place and you'll be right back where you started or he'll be working perhaps long hours and have less time to see you. If you think you're father is going to let you do as you please (he could depending on what kind of man he is) that's called an irresponsible father and by doing this he just doesn't care enough about you to set down some rules. Think about that one.

Oh yes, here's a thought .... sit down with your mother one night and start acting as much like an adult as you can and ask how SHE IS DOING!!!! Sometimes moms have so many responsibilities, work hard that they have little time to enjoy their own friends or express their own frustrations and fears. Instead of fighting your mom, talk to her and I bet she'll communicate with you. I am sure you will be in for a surprise to learn that your mom truly loves you and is doing the best she can. You obviously feel like you are mature enough to decide what parent you want to live with, so start acting like it and spread a little of that maturity your mother's way. Try it and see how you feel about your mother after that. Start to take on a little responsibility to help out around the house or apartment.

After your talk with your mother if you still want to leave and live with your father don't be too surprised if your father can't have you stay with him. His job may require him to work long hours or shiftwork and if you are a minor he would have the added expense of hiring someone to come in to look after you. It's expensive to live out in the real world.

I wish you luck and I hope you really think about what I have said and give your mom a fair shake. Try having that talk with her.

Good luck Marcy

Really? THAT'S your answer? Obviously you're a mother who thinks all father's should have no rights. My stepson has been wanting to live with his father for a long time but more so over the last four years or so. He even cries when we have to send him back to his mother's after summer vacation is over! You should take into consideration that not all Mother's are created equal and that some Father's make better parents. The world needs to give it's collective head a shake and stop thinking that only women are good parents! I've seen a lot of responsible Fathers stepping up to the plate and taking on the full time care of their children on their own. It should go as a case by case basis. Talk to other adults in your life who you respect and trust and get their opinion. (Not just your mother and father) If there are instances of abuse, call Kids Help Phone 1-800-668-6868 and they will help you get in contact with the people to help you. There are always options for a child to have someone trustworthy to talk to.

Answer 2

You can goto a judge and state that you want to live with your dad and he may ask you some questions or asign someone to goto all of your imediate family and ask them questions as far as what you want and why and how it is when your there. Is there a set time for bed, homework etc. And this person the judge sent will most likely be writing stuff down the entire time. After he's done talking to your family he will give the judge the notes and the judge will deliberate on that and most likely call you back in and ask you some more questions...