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(Note: Narcissistic Personality Disorder is something that can only be identified by a mental health professional who has examined the person in question. Other than that, "narcissist" is a word meaning "loves oneself excessively" and is susceptible to varying interpretations.)

1:

A narcissist is someone who takes their self-esteem from the way others view them. Their personality will therefore center around how he or she is viewed.

Narcissism looks like this... Your partner treats you and perhaps your children very different in private than in public. In public he may ignore you giving all of his attention to others, or pretend to be the perfect husband or father, while in private he may be sarcastic, haughty and insulting. He may put people down behind their back. He may have a very inflated sense of entitlement and ego, thinking he deserves things that he hasn't worked for or earned and he may manipulate situations for attention, acting a bit too good to be true. This can fool people and so few of them will believe how he talks to his family in private (I say 'he', because I write from our experience, but there are plenty of abusive women with narcissism). He may also show little or no regard for your well being or your feelings.

2:

Unfortunately that's not all...

He may lie about you or paint a bad picture of you to gain sympathy from others and to justify his own bad behaviour. You probably have no idea of all of the lies he is telling you and the bad things he may be saying about you to others ...

If he makes fights when you try and talk about money he may be hiding credit cards or money transactions from you and his narcissism will cause him to pretend these fights are your fault.

Many narcissists are obsessed by the fantasy of an ideal relationship that is 'perfect' (and therefore fantasy!) and are skilled liars. So if the above symptoms of narcissism describe your partner, you should also be aware that he may habitually have secret crushes on other women, be having affairs, using pornography habitually, and/or conducting 'cyber' affairs (while lying that he is single) all without you having any knowledge of this. If you notice that your partners mind is often somewhere else, and they show narcissistic tendencies, this could be the reason. This obsession with his own inner fantasy life is part of what makes him unavailable, impatient and cross with you. It is a major symptom of the disorder.

Not all people with narcissism are physically abusive, but it is also a significant indicator that you will wind up being part of a domestic violent marriage. The physical abuse is not always perpetrated by the narcissist either. It is normal to become very angry with someone who manipulates you and puts you down. It is normal after years of this treatment, (especially if you discover that they have been lying to and cheating on you) to even want to kill them or wish them dead, so getting the right help and support is very important, and can be very hard to find.

There are very few people who understand narcissism or believe there is any cure, and those who say to 'leave and have no contact' are giving you very dangerous advice. If you want to leave, please get advice first on how to do it safely.

Trying to diagnose someone with a disorder is not a really a good idea when there are many who will then say that you must divorce them and have no contact and that there is no cure.

If your partner displays this behaviour it is not important to figure out the correct diagnosis, what you need to do is take steps to protect yourself and save your marriage before it is too late.

My husband was diagnosed NPD and yet still he got better and we have a great marriage now. We help partners of narcissists save their marriages too.

3:

WRONG. The correct answer is - you can not recognize a narcissist. At least not a smart, experienced narcissist. It is a matter of survival for them to not let anyone know there true nature. (See note at top of page)

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8y ago
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15y ago

Characteristics of Narcissists:

amoral/conscienceless

authoritarian

care only about appearances

contemptuous

critical of others

cruel

disappointing gift-givers

don't recognize own feelings

envious and competitive

feel entitled

flirtatious or seductive

grandiose

hard to have a good time with

hate to live alone

hyper-sensitive to criticism

impulsive

lack sense of humor

naive

passive

pessimistic

religious

secretive

self-contradictory

stingy

strange work habits

unusual eating habits

weird sense of time Just a couple of these traits is enough to make them PATHOLOGICAL! Run!!

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13y ago

If suddenly you are feeling "confused" and "disoriented" being around this person, it's a good indicator that they are a narcissist.

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Q: How can you recognize a 'narcissist'?
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Related questions

Is there a cure for narcissistic personality disorder?

Yes. Go onto: www.google.com Then type in: Treatment for Narcissistic Personality Disorder?" Don't be surprised to find that there is little help because Narcissists are not labeled "Narcissistic" without a good reason. They feel they are right and everyone else is wrong, so it's highly doubtful they would ever seek counseling and if they did they wouldn't believe what the counselor told them anyway. Few Narcissistic people are every helped and therefore it's difficult to really study a group of people that are narcissistic.


What traits would disprove that someone has narcissistic personality disorder?

It's difficult to prove a negative. If a narcissist finds out some of those characteristics, all he has to do is be a good actor. Not being a narcissist is the only quality one could have to prove one is not a narcissist. There is no act a person can perform or one thing a person can do that would prove once and for all that the person is not and never has been and never will be a narcissist. Yet all the same, if you are not a narcissist, other people will recognize this fact, just as if you are, that too will come to light. Empathy. Narcissist's do not posess it nor do they understand it.


How do you diagnoise narcissism?

You see the pattern's of behavior and you make a diagnoses. Usually if you tell these patterns to a Dr. they will recognize it as narcissism because the narcissist will never admit that they truly are one.


What are the sources of guilt for a narcissist?

Conscience. One must know the difference between right and wrong and recognize that one has done wrong that has caused harm. Guilt is the emotional response to that recognition.


What type narcissist stays with another abusive narcissist?

A borderline. Essentially a more emotionally reactive narcissist.


How likely is it that a narcissist will recognize himself as narcissist?

OpinionNarcissism is a personality disorder not a mental illness; a narcissist is perfectly capable to make the distinction between right and wrong. If you wanted to ask if a narcissist will ever admit to others that he is one- NO-he will not alert the future victims and face the consequences of his actions.OpinionIndividuals with narcissistic personality disorder are usually unwilling to acknowledge their disorder. Although some may recognize the difficulty they have in their relationships with other people, they blame others for those problems. They are unable to modify their behavior. They have a conviction that they can do no wrong. They often have a defective ability to interprete other people's speech and actions which leads them to think they are liked and respected. One of the striking hallmarks of NPD is the utter lack of self awareness. Many do not recognize that they have a problem at all. If they do suspect they have a problem they are more likely to step up their self defense, reject outside intervention and avoid introspection at any cost and so they are doomed to repeat their failures and mistakes.


Is an egomaniac the same thing as a narcissist?

A narcissist is ALWAYS an egomaniacBut an egomaniac may not have the traits necessary to be a narcissist.amoral/consciencelessauthoritariancare only about appearancescontemptuouscritical of otherscrueldisappointing gift-giversdon't recognize own feelingsenvious and competitivefeel entitledflirtatious or seductivegrandiosehard to have a good time withhate to live alonehyper-sensitive to criticismimpulsivelack sense of humornaivepassivepessimisticreligioussecretiveself-contradictorystingystrange work habitsunusual eating habitsweird sense of time


How do you use narcissist in a sentence?

He is a narcissistic jerk.


Is it wise to tell everyone about the narcissist?

Be careful if you do, the narcissist can be a monster to anyone who hurts their pride.


Narcissist in love with a narcissist?

It's certainly possible. A narcissist may date another narcissist that is more selfish than they are to feel better about themselves. In turn say "i'm not as selfish as he/she is so that makes me above him/her). It's incredible and shocking the way people with this disorder think. It takes a lot of research to understand a narcissist.


What actors and actresses appeared in The Narcissist - 2012?

The cast of The Narcissist - 2012 includes: Tim Drake as The Narcissist Jordan Eyre as Crying Man Jeremy Wise as Billy


Is it possible to show a narcissist up publicly?

It is possible to show up a narcissist publicly, but if you do, the narcissist is going to be very angry at you. It is not always a wise strategy to make enemies.