How do you deal with emotionally abusive husband?

The short answer is that you don't--you leave because his treatment of you is so contrary to the relationship you deserve. You find people who will advise and support you as you make an exit plan to leave. It can take you a couple of years to come to terms with leaving the house and the lifestyle, but a few years after you do leave, your life will be rebuilt and so much better.
I don't necessarily agree with above answer: You don't throw in the towel to a marriage without first seeking every means for counsel, especially if there are children involved. The exception to this is if you are being endangered or the abuse is so severe it has taken a toll and you need a respite and I suggest with counseling. Emotional abuse is serious, generally the abuser is wounded and needs healing. They also need to also recognize they have a problem and have a desire to want to get healthy. You have to learn not to allow their abuse to define who you are as a person, this takes setting healthy boundaries. The book Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend will help you put some boundaries in place. I would also suggest to seek a support group and or counseling to help you learn how to respond to this behavior. I lived in this abuse for many years and until I learned how to react to it and received healing myself. I have a healed marriage now and my husband is a changed man. My prayers were answered, we are happily married now going on 18 yrs. don't give up on your marriage until you have exhausted all resources to save your marriage.