How do you help your son make the transition to preschool without crying every time he's dropped off?

Answer 1

He'll stop eventually. He probably quits the minute you're out the door. My son was the same way and his teacher told me that as soon as he was settled in with the other kids he stopped. It only lasted a couple of weeks. Good luck. Even if he can not really express himself, make an effort at bedtime or before to let him express what is going on during the day, what bothers him, what pleases him. My son had a really hard time for six months - he was not crying but simply tried to escape before I dropped him off at preschool. After talking to him in his own "language" and after overhearing his sleep talk, I suddenly understood that he was shocked that other kids scratched and bit him, took away toys and that teachers were not there to defend him at all. He was like a little Nemo in the sea of sharks. It is an exhausting life for little pre-schoolers but once they get attached to someone or something, the whole torture pays off. To ease the pain, I allow him to have brief but intense mommy time before and after school and avoid commanding him around right after I pick him up. Actually, when I drop him off, I let him know what we will be doing at night so he can focus on that if he is desperate. == == Make every morning the same. Explain sometime in an afternoon why mommy needs to work and why he needs to go to school. Talk about school at home, about friends there, toys there, the teacher. Ask for a picture of the teacher to have displayed at home, ask about favorite toys there (don't buy one), ask about friends there, read some of the same books. Praise all art and new knowledge from school. And especially.....most importantly, when you drop him off, hang up his coat, put away his lunch, greet his teacher, give him a hug, a kiss, a smile, tell him you love him and will be back after work like always and leave right away. Don't look back, smile the whole time. He will cry like crazy, scream "Mommy don't go!" and tear out your heart. Before your car is out of the parking spot he is smiling, giggling, drawing, singing and having an amazing time. But if you linger, peek in windows or draw out the experience he will get stressed out and have a very hard time calming down. If he stays unhappy for too long his teacher will let you know. Trust that. You picked a good school, a good teacher with a good class and she can handle it.

Don't ever blindly trust anything. If he's being bullied there or traumatized in any way, you should do something about it. Don't just keep on making him go through that and pretending that nothing is wrong. If it's really serious, take him out of the school and send him to a different one or homeschool him. There is always some other alternative. Being bullied can scar a kid for life.