How do you know if you still love your ex?

Answer 1

Here are opinions and advice: * Do you remember the things that made you fall for him in the first place? Can you remember how you felt about him the day you married him? Maybe all you need to do is start over. Let all the things that are hurting you go. Try to find one another again. Find what it is you like and love about him. Go on a date. Try to respark the feelings. It's never too late. Don't give up hope. * There is no easy answer to this. If you do nothing else, buy and read this book: "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay" by Mira Kirshenbaum. This book truly helped me answer the questions you are trying to answer. It takes you step by step through a decision process, including specific ways to measure how much, if any, love is left between you, and if that love is still viable. * I've heard it said many times that if you even have to ask yourself if you are still in love, you're not. * Love is a choice, not a feeling. The feeling that is referred to as love is more or less a reaction to certain stimulation. Love is giving, love is kindness, love is selflessness. Love is not something you take, but rather the reaction you feel once you give. * It would be argued by many, including myself, that if you have posed such a question you invariably already know its answer. What I mean is that being in love means not wondering if you are or if you aren't. Love is unconditional, thus if you doubt your own enough to ask, I am afraid it is already too late. I came across this website today and read some interesting answers about love. I read one that I am inclined to agree with. Perhaps because at heart I am a hopeless idealist. The philosophical side of me needs to believe that, like the one person stated, "if you have to ask the question..." I understand as a married man for over 10 years, I think it is hard to maintain that initial "spark" we once had in the beginning of our marriage. Between two professionals working 40 hours a week, the commuting, children, trying to juggle the other tasks of the week, you are lucky if you have three hours to spend together. But it seems to me that though, the "spark" may not be there like it was in the beginning, it is replaced with a deeper love based upon mutual respect and trust that has been earned over the course of the marriage. * There is always hope. I ask myself the question everytime I am hurt or angry, confused or frustrated with my partner. I think it is when you stop wondering and asking yourself that question is the day that you stop caring anymore and your answer becomes clear to you. That is when it is too late. * When you walk by this person do you want them to notice you? Do you always want to talk to this person? Do you always look at them and hope that they look at you? If so, I believe you are still in love. If you don't want to talk to this person a lot anymore then your not in-love so forget about it. * You could perhaps talk to a guidance counsellor who could help you assess the situation. It is good to have objective opinions. * I think that the opposite of love is not hate but indifference. If you care whether leaving the person would hurt them or not, then you still love them. If you don't want them to be with somebody else, then you still love them. And if you don't care then you don't love them. * I don't think that questioning if you love a person means you are already out of love with him or her. You have every right to question your beliefs (about anything), but that doesn't mean you don't believe them just by questioning. It's a good thing to question - it just means that you are trying to get to know yourself better. Over time, I think love for a person you are in a relationship with changes, and this can be mistakened for falling out of love. You may no longer feel as attracted to the person as you did on your first date, but that turns into a more compassionate love - which is also love. Be careful not to mistaken changes in feelings for falling out of love. Also, try to pinpoint if there are specific things that are bothering you lately, which again might be mistakened as no longer loving the person. Perhaps just addressing those specific problems will rekindle your feelings of love. * Love is not something you can touch but that emotion that you feel within yourself. As a husband for 17 years I can state that love is nothing but a mere emotion that we feel. My wife has good times as well as bad. She can be happy some days and sad some others. I believe true love can only be measured by your actions to your partners problems and feelings. As an example my wife last year told me that she was not sure if she loved me anymore. After careful reflection of what she was telling me I figured out that she was not happy with me since she felt that I did not appreciate her enough nor showed her enough of my love fowards her. Understand that the only reason why we are still together today is "only" because I took the time to listen to her before the problem got worse. Sometimes we can be egotistic, selfish, conceded and many more things that are wives state to us. Husbands need to make efforts to listen to there wives because they are different than we are. They truly might not be happy and doubt there love because they have no companion to communicate with. In my experience it is always good to talk things out before its to late. Don't ever think that because you doubt yourself about your love for your spouse this means that you dont love him or her. It might just mean that your dialogue needs to improve. * I thought I fell out of love with my wife and left her for another woman. I got bored with the same old routine and fell "in love" with another women of the complete opposite personality. After time away, and having the chance to experience someone different, I reflected on what it was about my wife that made me fall in love with her in the first place. Once I started focusing on the positives, versus negatives I found that I fell in love with my wife again, only for her to fall out of love with me. Love is more than feelings of infatuation and the giddiness that comes with it. True love is much deeper and accepts all of the other person, good and bad. Everyone is always looking for waht they don't have, instead of accepting and being happy with what they do have. * This depends on what you are asking. Are you asking if YOU are in love or if BOTH OF YOU are in love? People get a little silly when it comes to love, expecting that if it's real they will feel it all the time, but as human creatures we don't work that way. What about the rest of the full set of human emotions we must experience? The truth is that we can only really FEEL one emotion at a time. When you are angry you feel anger, not love. When you are sad you feel sadness, not love. When you are joyful you feel joy ... well, to some people that's love, but my point is you have to leave some room for real life and the other emotions you are going to experience too. If you want to spend time with someone and share loving feelings, then you are in love. If they want the same thing, then it's likely BOTH of your are in love. It's incredibly simple. Are you going to stay in love? Now that's more complicated. That's a personal choice and takes effort and it's up to each of you. * If you are having doubts about being in love than you are probably falling out of love. You just need to listen carefully to your heart. If you are in true love trust me you'll know. * Love is a decision. Perhaps you are simply working out struggles in your marriage relationship. I say, give it a chance and try to work it out. I've been married 34 years. We had our trying times, that's for sure, but it has turned out to have been worth hanging in there. Now I know what true love is, and I'm more satisfied now than I've ever been in my whole life. For me, it was worth the commitment to one another that it took to work things through together in order to find what we have now.

Answer 2

They still make you feel the way you felt when you were with them.Your always always search for your ex when you go somewhere.When you see them, you can't take your eyes off of them.You get jealous when you see him her with someone else.You are curious about what is going on in their life especially their love life.You always think about them and something always reminds you of them..there isn't a day that goes by without them being in your mind. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you have to ask.....The answer is obvious! You still do! Y-THINK-Y

Answer 3

Well Tbh If Your Ex Truley Loved You And You Truley Loved Him Then Your Always Going To Have Some Sort Of Feelings For Him? May Not Be Love But Still Something , Right?

Why Do You Ask Such A Question? - Only You Will Know If You Still Love Eachother? My Ex Hates The F*** Out Of Me, Telling Me To Die In A Hole And That? But If You Really Love Him Nothing Will Stop You From Loving Him. No Matter What It Is. Just Try And Move On.

Answer 4

When you cant imagine being with anyone else and you get jealous of him being with other girls, also if you cant stop thinking about him and miss being with him.

Its hard moving on, I'm in the same situation and cant seem to get over my ex but im just taking it each day one step at a time so just do the same.