How do you trust a spouse who admits to an emotional affair but stresses he was only helping a friend?

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She was having serious family trouble but he didn't tell me he was helping her because I was overly jealous of her. He is also her boss. I understand him helping her but he deceived me for months. He admitted to talking to her daily, working closely with her, going to lunch with her but says he was only helping her since it was affecting her job and just got in too deep. Do I believe him or not. I was the one who discovered it and have had to drag any information out, he hasn't really offered anything on his own but says he loves me and wants to be together forever.  

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He needs to end the relationship now, end contact as much as possible (only business discussions at work), and enter into marital counseling with you. Your marriage won't ever be the same, if you want to stay in your marriage, you will have to learn to trust him again, and he will have to admit to the problems that caused him to turn to this co worker.
I'm sorry about what's going on to you, but if your husband still won't discuss what happened and admit to the affair, there are going to be a lot of problems and resentments in your marriage.  

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My husband admitted to an emotional affair, but for two LONG years adamantly said they were "just good friends" - my response was always the same - you can't be "just good friends" with the opposite sex if you are already in a relationship.
What was the result? He has just admitted to me he is in love with her and doesn't know how it happened - although he still loves me too. Men (and women) are more vulnerable than they think - people in this situation think they are so strong and "would never let this happen", but it snuck up on him, and like others, found himself in this predicament.
Closeness eventually creates intimacy, and because both married parties (the friends) think they have boundaries - ie, "we are married therefor we know we won't fall in love" become closer and closer until it's too late.
Sirach Chapter 36:25 writes "A property with no fence will be plundered." or "Where no hedge is, there the possession is spoiled."
You and your husband must establish boundaries within your life to protect all that you have.  

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Take it from me, an emotional affair is an affair. He is obviously getting something from her he isn't getting from you. If she didn't mean anything to him, he wouldn't have let this go on for so long. Being involved with her, regardless if there wasn't/isn't any sex, he still was giving her emotional support,time, needs and so forth. He was giving her what he should have been giving you.
Tell him how you feel about everything. And ask him to stop being there for her. He needs to be there for you.
An emotional affair is an affair. Fifty percent of emotional affairs turn physical.
Good Luck. My heart goes out to you.  

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Emotional affair is still an affair.

 

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I don't know. I'm going through the same thing. He says they were just friends and he needed to talk to her about me. He gave her more time than me and told her intimate details of our marriage. He won't admit it was an affair but I disagree. I would like to know how to trust him again also. I can't believe anything he says and I am hurt and angry and feel he is not doing his part to help make this work. He says he loves me and wants to stay married to me. I just don't see it. We need help. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.