If an 18-year-old boy tells a 12-year-old girl he wants perverted sex with her what should the girl do?

NOTE: Any text that was biased or put forth no intelligent or serious argument has been removed. Text containing arguments on both sides of this issue have been left in so that readers have the opportunity to see multiple opinions without having to read a series of useless contributions.

NOTE: Before answering you should read the existing answers. Duplicate arguments/answers/opinions will simply be removed.

NOTE: To put the following arguments into perspective, first browse the related link.

ANSWER:

18 and 12 isn't really that big an age difference. It was perfectly acceptable in the past in the United States. There are famous people we admire who would qualify as a pedophile according to today's laws. Edgar Allen Poe was over 25 when he married a 13 year old. It was fine back then. While I wouldn't suggest an age difference like that today, 18 and 12 isn't that big a difference.

No one is taking into consideration the way the 18 year old asked the question. For one, the question may be hypothetical. If the conversation did take place, it may have been an 18 year old she knew very well. the "perverted" part may be the way she feels about sex at her current age. It doesn't mean he directly stated "I want to have PERVERTED sex with you". Maybe they care about each other, but she simply isn't ready for sex at 12 years old and regards it as "perverted". He doesn't automatically pose an instant threat. If he started to get pushy about it or try and convince her to do it, then someone (ie. responsible adult) should be contacted about it. Otherwise, let it go. She told him "no" and that's the end. If he isn't pursuing it, then there is nothing to worry about. This site doesn't need 500 people all saying to tell your mom and run to the police and make sure he gets locked up because hes a criminal. This site needs legitimate, well thought out answers that are actually going to make readers think differently (for the better) and use real judgment in determining the right way to handle the situation in question.

ANSWER:

When an 18-year-old has sex with a 12-year-old, that is a perversion. Please, please, please tell your parents. They should contact an authority. That boy might (just might) not deserve to be thrown in jail but he does need to be under observation of some kind to protect the innocent. He may just need serious mental help but he may not stop at threatening little girls. His solicitation alone is a crime and this kind of behavior only escalates. Avoid him like the plague and tell the other girls you know to do the same. He is a very dangerous person. If he is your cousin, brother, or some other person that your parents may not want to believe is capable of this kind of behavior you may need to tell another adult, like a teacher, school counselor, aunt/uncle on the other side of the family and enlist their help in talking to your parents. Sometimes it is very very hard for people to hear very ugly truths about people they love and often the information hurts so much the won't believe it. Do not put yourself and other girls in danger to protect your parents. They love you and want you to be safe more than anything else in the world. Trust in that. You could also contact the police (although this is easier with an adult, they can be a little harsh), or a sexual assault recourse, like SARA (sexual assault recourse agency) they specialize in helping people who have been assaulted (and you were) in getting the help and support they need and also can help you with ensuring you are safe and notifying the police. Please, tell someone and get help, this is serious business.

ANSWER:

First off, don't be alone with the 18 year old. He is considered an adult, and you are a child even though you may feel like you are mature. Any guy that age who tells a 12 year old that he wants sex is a PREDATOR. He is dangerous and may do what he is talking about. The 12 year old girl needs to talk to an adult that she trusts and feels comfortable talking to. The adult should help her contact the state agency that deals with child protective services. Once that is in the works, the agency is bound by law to notify the police. It may be difficult or embarrassing, but if he said that to one girl, chances are he is also after other young girls. If possible, find other girls he has approached, as other witnesses will help her case and credibility. He could just deny it, then it would be her word against his. Be strong and report it IMMEDIATELY. Stay AWAY from him. DON'T ever let him touch you. Hope you get help and the 18 year old predator is dealt with so he can't hurt anyone. IMPORTANT: don't let him talk you out of reporting him--he may try and make you feel guilty about "ruining his life". That's not your problem- it's HIS problem. Please get help.

The girl is a human, not chattel or property

She should not give in to mental, social, or legal abuse because of her or anyone else's age. What she does depends on who they are and what they want, and is nobody else's business unless she'll be harmed. Beliefs against sexual acts are very culture-dependent, and they have no rational basis other than by delusional faith or other imaginary wrongs. In the question here on whether it's okay for a 12-year-old to masturbate, every answer agreed that it was fine; yet, why should it be the exact opposite when there are two persons bestride the legal age?

Because the 18 year old is exploiting the lack of mental and physical maturity of the 12 year old.

ANSWER:

If you are worried about good kids,

More in line with this subject, which you can look up on Wikipedia or elsewhere, the age of consent in England in the 1200s was none and then 12; likewise, Canada's original age was 12; and a bunch of remote European countries-uniform with not many foreigners, I guess-are still at 12. It was only in the late Victorian era (1890) when the lawmakers made the age about or near 16. Over half of the outcry against lust and youths are faith-motivated. Until the Victorian era, girls had no status.

This question is not about sexual battery or rape; it's about a nondescript "perverted sex"

A state or person cannot say how old everyone, anyone, can be to be "ready" or "fit" for sexual relations. Look at all of the 18-to-25-year-old rapists. Were they ready because they were legal?

ANSWER:

People are paranoid

People are just plain paranoid. An 18 year old guy wanting to have sex with a 12 year old girl (or 13, or 14, whatever) does not immediately result in that guy being a pedophile, sexual predator, etc. That's based on cultures. Some states of the United States the age of consent is 14, some 16 and some even 17 if I remember correctly. In some areas of Africa the age of consent is even 9 years old. A 9 year old is a 9 year old. End of story. A 9 year old African girl may have had more life experience than a 9 year old American girl due the different living conditions, but she is still 9 and obviously would not be ready to consent to sex, etc. If the 12 year old girl wants to have sex with the 18 year old guy, that is her decision. As long as he isn't forcing anything upon or or strongly insisting upon the sex, then what's the big deal? Even in the Bible, Mary was about 13 years old when she married Joseph (who was about 30 something). There was nothing wrong with that and Joseph was not some kind of pedophile. Pedophiles are a completely different story and anyone with a quarter of a brain could figure that out with a few minutes of research.

ANSWER:

Stating what happened in the 1200's or in biblical times is fairly irrelevant, this is the 21st century. The disparate ages of consent across the world reflect both the culture and the respect that a society has for itself. There is something infinitely sad about an 18 year old wanting to be with a 12 year old. What is even more sad is the lengths to which people will go to justify it.

ANSWER:

The Bottom Line

If you are 18, you LEGALLY can not have sex with anyone under the age of 18. (At least in the state of Alabama.) Check local laws and Jurisdiction. NEVERTHELESS. TELL YOUR PARENTS.

Answer:

If your 12 and he's 18 thats a big NO - no because your too young to have sex. If you think your ready well you're not; there are 12 years old or somewhat younger kids or teens having babies that now regret it every much. He might not be someone you can trust he might be crazy. And it's gross because he's too old for you, think common sense here and tell your parents because he might want to do more then have sex with you so be careful and dont let him trick you.