Is excessive tickling abuse?

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I'm 28, when I was in primary 6 and I was 10 I used to play games with my classmates and I sometimes cheat. I used to play games during a one to one with my teacher (a lady). When I cheat my teacher would get me, pin me down and just tickle me. I said "sorry sorry sorry" she goes "too late to be sorry" and continues tickling me. Would you call that torturing?  

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In short, if someone gets hurt or killed or is unhappy with it, then you need to stop. It is not exactly abuse, but it is harassment. There is no need to read anything else.  

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My husband, since we have been dating he has excessively tickled me. I am so sensitive that I once fell off a chair and caused a whole scene. He does not stop when I ask him. My sister did the same thing when I was little and she called it tickle torture. She would tickle me until I peed my pants. It is so frustrating. When my kids ask them to stop tickling, I get really upset and defend my children, just because I know how not fun it is.  

Tickling and Abuse

If you asked him/her to stop and s/he goes on despite your protestations and pleas - it is abusive.  

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Most people don't consider ticking someone breathless abuse, but the other poster is right. While some people aren't even ticklish the majority are. Tickling someone relentlessly causes breathlessness and can lead to choking or even vomiting. When asked to stop the tickler should! I've too often seen an adult pin a child down in play and tickle the child. When the child screams out that they want it stopped the adult continues. It is abuse plain and simple. A little tickling goes a long way.
Put it this way, the "Chinese Water Torture" (letting one drop of water fall on a tied down victim's forehead for hours) is not painful in the least, but the monotony of that one drop of water can drive a person insane.  

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Everybody reacts to tickling differently so I think. Many folks have multiple tickle spots with some of the areas sensitive. While there are others who may not have any tickle spots, the bottom of the feet were supposedly everyerybody's tickle spot. With this question I think a lot of the answer lies in the word "excessive". Speaking from my own experience, I recall a great amount of energy and adrenalin put out to endure the over kill tickle. As the partner doing the tickling displays what looks to be that of a "very satisfied emotion". This leads me to think that they are actually getting enjoyment watching you ... trying to endure this excess tickle, until stopped.  

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I am sorry, but I have to interfere in this one. Forcing a child or adult to comply to something they do not like such as this tickling regiment is simply not right. The child will grow angry from frustration and it's just not acceptable. The tickler has a mean streak! Plain and simple! It's called "control!" If it were my husband doing this to my son or daughter and they didn't like it he didn't stop he's be laying flat on the floor!
Remember, we teach our children and have been taught ourselves that if someone is touching us in an inappropriate manner (not just sexual either) we have the right to say NO and that "no" should be taken seriously.  

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My ex- boyfriend is a narcissist. He tickled to excess by making his fingers so rigid that when he 'tickled' it was very painful. If told to stop he would become very angry- he seemed to take it as rejection. He would also accuse the tickled person as "being no fun". He did the same with tackling and wrestling, and biting during sex. When I was told I am "no fun" I often felt mixed emotions. I felt angry and guilty for hurting his feelings- if only I paid attention to this huge red flag...  

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Don't blame yourself. Most people will try tickling another and "tickling" never seems to be an abusive action, but when it's forced on someone that doesn't like it and it goes on and on, then it's simply abuse and a control factor. Still waters run deep.
Next time ... say NO and mean it!  

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well, tickling is great when people are playing and they can say YES to a certain point but we must attuned to the fact that when we go to far when tickling someone, it can be serious, on my opinion of course. the fact is: tickling can for ones something like pleasure for example when we grab the feet of someone and we tickle the soles of the feet, in a soft way it can relax and be something good and that person can like, but when we are talking of someone very ticklish, we must be careful because for that person, tickling isn't seen like a playing way but like a TORTURE and is on that point that we must stop because it really can turn a person crazy and people really can lose their minds with that torment. when they are in ticklish agony, they can't breathe perfectly and the nervous system reacts to it causing sometimes a bad feeling. tickling was used too, in the time of the Romans, like a method of torture to get information and some people even died of so much tickling!!! we must respect the person that we are tickling especially if we are tickling on the most ticklish spot of the body: the FEET! i don't know anybody that isn't ticklish on their feet.....  

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I think its all a matter of how it is used. For instance, take the situation of a young child, and a parent. Even though it isn't/wasn't meant to be abuse, it is. I know, I know, you were just having fun with your kid, and I understand that, but next time instead of tickling even after you are asked/told to stop by your child, maybe tickle them for a period of time, stop, and if the child enjoyed it, try it again. Who knows, they might even try to tickle you back. Another instance is when two people tickle each other in fun. This may be between two friends, people seeing each other, etc. If someone goes after they are told to stop, it may not be so bad, and this is only my personal opinion, but I wouldn't see it as abuse, just as long as it is a laughter causing tickle, and not one of pain. You just better hope he/she that's was being tickled isn't 'mad at you, and I think you can figure out why. Another aspect is one of the whole being tied and tickled. This can be very fun for two people. You wouldn't see this done to a child, though, unless you're completely perverted, in which case I suggest you see a doctor. But anyway, this whole concept is usually fun, and taken in a "happy" manor, and usually results with a positive reaction, just as long as you are tickling, and not hurting. And don't do things that aren't comfortable with the other person, and you should be able to tell when you've overstepped your boundaries by the tone, even if it is smothered with laughter. I think the bottom line is, with children, they aren't built the way we are yet, and when they say "stop", it should be obeyed. Teens, and adults on the other hand know what they are getting into, and should be prepared with what happens. Again, I'm talking tickling of the usual areas, feet, armpits, etc. Not the private parts. Just keep it within common sense/moderation. That's what I think, thanks for reading.  

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"Excessive" is the operative word. If it's taken to a level where it's painful, or continued after the person has been asked to stop (if you aren't 100% sure you can tell a playful "Hey, cut it out!" from the person truly wanting it stopped, then don't do it. Always err on the side of not abusing.) Also, the circumstances matter: a normally non- abusive amount of tickling when the person is carrying something (thus making him/her drop it and have to clean it up, break it, etc.) or has to go to the bathroom (thus making him/her have an accident though it would normally take an amount considered abusive) or other circumstances where it would be harmful or create problems for the person would be abuse.
And the person being tickled always has the last word on where the line between fun and harm is drawn. Permission is also the element that separates sex from rape, or accepting a gift from theft, or a visit from a home invasion. It applies here, and is the one thing that decides whether or not this a game or a violent act.  

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I'm sorry But I tickle my kids feet to tears and I see nothing wrong with it. I love to hold her down and rip off her shoes and socks and tickle her feet until she gets to the silent laughter, and I'm sorry if people in here want to protest but all I have to say is your lucky your not my kid because I would tickle those assumptions right out of your feet.
 

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Even though I'm painfully ticklish, I'd offer my feet for you to tickle those assumptions out of. So as to spare your daughter further ticklish torment. I know you'd probably tickle me to eye rolling panic and breathless laughter, not to mention half to death for my brashness but at least your daughter has a reprieve. Tickling my feet would make the couch move across the floor, even if the floor is carpeted. If you tried to tickle my ribs, I'd pop through the skylight in contortions of hysterical laughter, much to the consternation of your upstairs neighbours.
 

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Sometimes tickling can be about fun and nothing more. Sometimes, however, it can be used to control and intimidate. If someone makes you suffer against your will, no matter what the method, it is abuse.
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Tickling can be a whole lot of fun when both the he and the her respect each others' boundaries, which is an absolute must. Tickling involves personal contact, and must be consensual. If it is not, then it is abuse!
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I think that claiming that tickling is abuse is ridiculous. I'm sure you could tickle enough that it becomes wrong, but come on.. how many people honestly are harmed while being tickled? It's not like complete strangers come up and abuse you in the street by tickling you. Claiming that you're harming your children by tickling them is absurd. It's part of this culture and you can't point your fingers at someone and claim they are abusive just because you have an issue with being tickled.
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i have been tickled like to death by my friends and they just don't stop they just think its funny one of my friends did it for an hour!  

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I have almost been tickled to the brink of insanity a few times by friends and not only do they not stop tickling me they think it's funny and are sometimes laughing more than I am. One time, a "friend" caught me in a recliner and quickly moved the handle moving the foot rest up and then with a couple of quick twists with a scarf, he had my soles at his disposal. He drew a line up my helpless sole. I gritted my teeth and refused to laugh. He liked my show of defiance.
But for all my visible torment, I was still refusing to give in to the tickling, and by this I think you know what I mean. Oh sure, I struggled wildly against my restraints and continuously vocalized my anger, but I would not succumb to that subtle humiliation that all ticklers must succumb to at some point, regardless of how proud, angry, or assertive they are ..... this is the humiliation of being forced to laugh. Gasping and shouting threats I persisted in my stubbornness. If he could just find the right button, he could open the floodgates of my hysterical laughter. Once that laughter starts, it never stops until the tickling subsides.
My defiant nature failed me in the next instant. That button was found. He started stroking just under my toes. That did it. My rump rocketed off the recliner as I burst into uncontrollable whoops of laughter. The sinews in my neck and shoulders stood out visibly as I contorted in wild screams of ticklish agony.
He had me howling and shrieking for about a half hour. I was to laughter weakened to resist when he scarfed my wrists to the top of the chair. I begged and pleaded with him not to tickle my ribs but it was no use. When he started "rib counting", I was bucking and bouncing like a crazily ticklish rodeo rider. He continued my very ticklish situation for over an hour.
When he released me, my laughter weakened body was to weak to retaliate. I lay there gasping for air to fill my aching lungs. In a way, I was glad he hadn't tickled me half to death.
The "rush" of prolonged tickling is like being punished and being given a present at the same time. So I see how it could be simultaneously pleasure and pain, for those who like excitement, like sky diving.
From my experience prolonged excessive tickling where the adult is the tickler is abuse and torture. When I was 14, my stepmother who had 100 lbs on me and 5 inches taller, tickled me the point I was crying (not laughing) and vomiting. It went on for an entire hour. It was so severe, I was actually sore for days. She wasn't trying to be playful either. She never was really liked me. And was angry. Honestly felt like I was about to die in the grips of an angry giant!
Simple tickling with light pressure for less than a minute is all play. Excessive tickling using force for a prolonged period is a malicious act where the intent is to torture and kill. I honestly felt that my stepmother was very jealous about me. I somehow interfered in her relationship with my father. So when this horrible act occurred, I honestly felt this jealous stepmother was trying to kill me. And if dad had not come home when he did, she may have killed his son
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Just like anything else it can be good or bad. Personally, my three children frequently plop down on my lap and say "TICKLE ME!". They absolutely love it. But of course I am always careful to let them catch their breath and I stop when they say stop. By the time we are done we are both worn out and laughing! However, I could easily see how this could become a form of abuse. Excessive tickling is far worse than a simple beating. The tickler is bigger and stronger than you and has you pinned beneath them. Its very painful and you have no control over simple reflexive actions of your body. Its like this person has hijacked your body and you are powerless.
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The phrase, "Its like this person has hijacked your body and you are powerless" is bang on. And yet because you are laughing, it seems as if the whole experience should be fun. You're frantic contortions to escape the tickling and yet your desperate laughter from the tickling make for a potent psychological combination of agonizingly pleasurable hysterics.
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No tickling is not good particularly the person who are ticklish. Maybe you can give him/her some test tickles but continuing it is doing harm to him/her. And I very much oppose tickling a child. They are really helpless. So don't do it it's an abuse... straight and simple
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I think you parents that think PLAYFUL tickling of your children is abuse are freaking whack jobs. Please, for the sake of your children's childhood, give them up to a better family! You're probably the same parents that won't smack your kids when they do something wrong? Morons! Look, I'm not saying that it's okay to pin your children down and tickle them for hours or until they can't breathe, but there's not a %%%%ED thing wrong with tickling your kids' feet. I have quite fond memories of my mom and dad waking up to me crawling into their bed at 6AM on Saturday mornings to watch cartoons (Back in those days, people didn't have a TV in every room.) Anyway, they'd wake up and next thing you know I'd be squirming around trying to escape the "tickle monster." That was part of the Saturday morning ritual, and I relished every moment. To the ONE person that said she'd continue tickling her kids feet no matter what: Keep right on with it!

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The main problem is that it is too easy for the tickler to go overboard. We've all been tickled beyond our comfort zone, so we know that agonizing helplessness, laughter verging on hysteria, the frantic desperation for it to stop yet caught up by the intense sensation. The intense sensation makes it very hard for the person to indicate that they have had enough. It is very easy to cause breathless laughter and eye rolling panic in a very ticklish person, so that their body is totally under the tickler's control. If the tickler is not sensitive to how helpless the truly ticklish are, he or she may drive the insanely ticklish to the brink of insanity, without realizing it.
The main problem is not the tickling, but the tickler's lack of awareness of what the truly ticklish are experiencing during the tickling. Even if the tickling started off as playful, it is very easy to cross the prolonged tickling line for the totally ticklish. Making the experience very psychologically upsetting for the person. Yet the person's laughter seems to indicate to the tickler that the person is enjoying the experience immensely and the person's laughter seems to indicate to the person, themselves, that they should also be enjoying the experience. The person is caught between the pleasure and pain centers of the brain which are "close" together. Thus, making the tickling both a present and punishment at the same time.