Yes, it is deviate in the sense that you know better; don't care if you hurt your spouse's feelings and know it's wrong as well as not having the courage to communicate with your spouse and try to save your marriage.
My take on this is that you should let sleeping dogs lie. Break up with him, stop having sex with him. You do not have a good, firm relationship based on trust at this point, and if you do not, or...
If there is weapon in the home she is in grave danger of being charged with "possession" of a firearm, and YOU could also be charged as an accessory for knowingly allowing her to have access.It is...