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Is it normal to feel like maybe it was only you the narcissist treated badly and maybe he wouldn't be that way with others and is this a part of healing from it?
Wiki User
∙ 12y ago
No, narcassistic people are this way with many (often will argue with coworkers, family and friends) and you had nothing to do with it and you didn't cause him to be this way. You got the worst of it because you are the most closely connected to this person. They consider society stupid as a whole and only they have the right answers. Narcassistic behavior is one who believes the only right way is their way and often can be confused with "perfectionism."
Marcy
They are masters at maniuplation. They are no more intelligent than the average Joe Blow but they use their smarts to use and abuse. Victims often think if they were nicer, smarter, prettier and so on that the narcassist would have realised what he or she had and turned around and been a good partner. The truth is they do see your good qualities but not in a positive light. The use and abuse your good quailities to their advantage. In addition, they view them as a threat.For example, if you are kind person they will use that to get what they want. If you are pretty they will start tearing your looks apart. If your popular or well liked they may try and turn others against you. It was nothing about you. They treat all partners like crap eventually. Just tell yourself it is better to have a tempoarily wounded heart and pride that a life long guarantee of misery, heartache and NO self esteem if you stay with them.I suggest also no contact. Ignore them if you see them. Not even a simple hello. They read into any politeness as a open door to con and lie.
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Yes it is. I spent a long time looking back wondering if it could have been me, because he would tell me he wasn't like this with anyone else and one day I realized he was just trying to put me down because his character wasn't something you could just be with one person. The key was he wasn't with people that knew him well enough, only new people.
Wiki User
∙ 12y ago
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How do you help a narcissist?
The question is help them how? Refer them to counseling, but they don't want to be fixed, though you may want to fix them to be a 'normal' person so you can keep a relationship with them. If you are a lay person and in a relationship with a narcissist, you cannot help them. Just by the nature of your relationship and the pathology of a narcissist, things will get ugly, it will be at your expense and there will be no change in the narcissist. A good therapist will be the one to help a narcissist, but it takes a great deal of work on the part of the narcissist, a commitment to healing, only they don't see themselves as 'broken' or anything wrong with them, so an honest introspective communication with a therapist is rare. It's so hard to understand. Leaving them is best for you though and isn't that sad that that is also the way to help a narcissist, because they are sucking your goodness from you and using it to buoy themselves. So sad.
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Si and no i do not speak spanish o and OFWGKTA
