Is it wrong for a 16-year-old and a 20-year-old to be in love with each other?

Answer 1

No, there is no problem with it as long as there is no sex involved, when the 16 year old turns 18 they can have sex. But personally, I've met a 23 year old that is married to a 65 year old, so no there is no problem with that, because I can't have sex with my girlfriend; she's 18 and I'm not 18 yet so we can't have sex.

Some opinions by WikiAnswers contributors:

• My mother was 16 when she married my father at 32. I was born a year later. Whether it was wrong for them to love each other is a question that is easily answered by people who have never found themselves in that situation however the result of that love was that a woman who was much too young to be lumbered with a family ended up with 3 kids by the time she was 21. Love is never wrong but the results of it may at times lead to outcomes that could be improved upon. These days with the use of Birth Control the situation may be better controlled but I doubt if it would still lead to the best outcome. However a 4 year difference would not mean a great deal in the real scheme of things.
• When we say love, age doesn't matter.
• There is NOTHING wrong with it; when I was 14, I was in love with an 18 year old my parents did not approve of. We had to sneak around with our relationship for a long time. Cops got involved a few times, but in the end when I was 15 we got an apartment together. As long as your sure he loves you and he's the one, that's all that matters. From the start, I was treated amazingly and today I still am.
• No. The person I love and I have a four year age gap. We have been together for a year and we couldn't be happier. Some of my family doesn't approve but with love, you can get past anything. Don't give up love when it makes you happy because people think its "wrong". Is it wrong to be happy?
• Well I met my husband at 15 and waited 8 years to get married. He was 20 when we met. We have been married for 18 years and are still happy as can be. I would suggest waiting until you are older to get married. You must first finish school and get an education. Establish yourself financially and enjoy being together. Take life a day at a time!
• Yes, it is wrong.
• As my mom says "age is but a number", you can't control your feelings. But in some cases it can be illegal, so be careful.
• If you love the person and you feel you're ready, go ahead, but remember the consequences of your actions. It doesn't matter how old you are as long as you love each other.
• No, there's no problem with that, as long as you don't do any thing stupid and if you both are mature.
• It depends on the person and not the age. I'm 23 and dating a 15 year old, but she has way more life experience than most people I know my age, and is more responsible than me :P Just don't let a relationship get ahead of itself: While age doesn't define the person, it still rules a person, for example in education received, years worked, financial status will usually improve with age.. so be sure to keep it at a level that is appropriate for both. The older partner needs to remain aware that the younger won't be ready for major commitments as soon.
• Well, I am 15 and I really like a 20 year old - he treats me like a princess and I am mature for my age so I think it is fine, but nothing serious is going to happen until I am at least 16/17. If you're happy then you're happy and you can't help who you like or fall in love with.
• Some people like to think that age doesn't matter, but the law does. In the eyes of two "lovers" it's right but in the eyes of the government it can be a serious crime.
• Me, I'm 14, and I'm in love with a 16-year-old, we've been dating for about 5 months now, and I couldn't be happier. Just be yourself, listen to your heart.
• Mark Twain said: "When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." There is a lot of truth in that. We are very prone to overestimating the level of our maturity when we are teenagers. While it is possible to fall in love at 16, there is still a lot of maturing that usually takes place between then and when you turn 20, so there is likely to be a significant gap in maturity between the 16-year-old and the 20-year-old.
• No, it's not wrong. I myself am in love with someone around that age group and it is fine. No matter what anybody says, if you love him, you love him regardless. If things don't work out then it wasn't meant to be, but if things do work out then it was meant to be & you should be happy to be in love.
• Yes.
• I say no because there is always a person for someone to love in the world so there is nothing wrong at all. here's an example: Hugh Hefner is 80 and he technically dates the playboy bunnies...
• To be honest, you should go ahead and date the guy, it's up to you if you want to have sex. Just be protected if you do, go on the pill, use a condom, or BOTH. 4 years difference isn't that bad, not like your friends can make fun of you about it; in fact they might praise you for it.
• Well, if you are in love then there is no stopping it, but if you just have a crush on him then yes there is something wrong (well only a 4 year difference but still).
• Yes it is very wrong for a 16-year-old to date a 20-year-old because they may want bad stuff from you. I personally think people should date people their own age or 1 year older.
• Well first off, its highly unlikely your 'in love'. Loving someone and being in love is different. But no it's not really so long as you obey the law.

well i dont think it is wrong but if you two really love eachother, you can wait until you are at least 18. 4 years starts to not be that big of a difference when you get older so my advice is to wait until you are at least 18. i hope that you two end up happy together!

Answer 2

Im 16 and with a 27 year old at the moment!! and looks like we are going to be together for a long time .. am engaged to him and am totally in love with him!!! so dont worry hun your not on your own!! and its not wrong!! if you love him go 4 it and dont worry what other people say and dont let them put you down!!!!!!

No, its not wrong because I was 16 when I met my future husband and he was 28, we have now been together for 8 years, been married for four and a half years, have two children and we are still going strong. There is so much you can both learn from each other, and I think the danger would only arise from the fact that you may not be emotionally ready to be involved with someone that much older. If you feel you are, then the only way to find out is to go for it! Im glad I did!

No, it isn't wrong at all! Just make sure that you don't rule out guys that are actually attainable.

You can learn some very important things about yourself through this too. Try to pinpoint what exactly it is about this great guy that makes you crazy about him. These could be physical, but also personality-wise too. You can learn what you are drawn to, and learn to recognize those traits in other people too.

But don't feel like you're committing some horrible sin or anything, what you are feeling is completely natural. Feelings are never right or wrong, they are simply there. So, it is useless to worry whether or not a feeling is right or wrong. What is right or wrong is your action, your response to the feeling.

Yes, that's not right. It's not love, it's infatuation. The outlook a 16 year old and a 27 year old have on life is completely different. They will not have common ground, and nothing to build a relationship off of. Bad idea.

: There is someone for everyone. If you like older men, and you consider how kind he is, and he makes you laugh, you can be alright with it. There are laws about under eighteen, but if you can get by that, you have something that may be hard to find for other people.

Oh please, person above the person above me.Sweetie, there's nothing wrong with being in love with someone older than you. My boyfriend's 20 and I'm 15! While you really should aim for people in your age group, it's not like it's a total sin. That's an 11 year age difference, but who cares? When you find someone you truly care about and it's someone who puts your feelings before theirs and vice versa, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it! So good luck!

Answer 3

People will have different views about it and what matters is also the individuals. Not all 16yo are the same etc. What is right and wrong iss as individual as people. What is legal is another matter.

While dating is legal, that is seeing each other socially, any physical relationship is not legal.

Answer 4

Yes, legally and morally it is wrong but when she turns 16, there is nothing the law can do about this. (16 being the legal age in UK)

I don't think it is wrong at all, you can't help who you fall in love with - i should know by experience.

I'm 16 and I fell in love with a 25 year old man, who has an ex wife and 2 kids.

If this 15 year old girl is mature enough to love an older man then it shouldn't matter if he is 45/50 years old.

And even though she is underage, things need to stay in control until this young girl turns 16.

A lot of people can get the wrong idea about this situation, but until you are put into this kind of situation you will never know how hard it is.

To me age is just a number, love is the only thing that really matters.

Answer 5

No it is not wrong. In fact it is very normal. Be careful you are not mistaking love for lust. It is likely you are feeling both. Lust will fade, but if she still makes you happy a year from now then it is love. Never give up on love.

Answer 6

Depends on the couple. The minors parents have to be OK with this and nothing sexual can happen until the minor have reached age of consent. Dating itself is not illegal, there are only laws for sexual activity.

Answer 7

Not at all. With no other information, that age and age gap isn't all that unusual.

Answer 8

I doubt it unless my father and mother were wrong as well. This sortof thing is dependant on what is considered acceptable in a given society at any given time in history.

Answer 9

Yes. Be ashamed.