Stan and John are walking to school one day and Stan is describing his new Playstation 2 to John. "Where did you get that?" John asked "I got it last night for Hanukkah," said Stan. "What's Hanukkah?" John asked.
"It's the Jewish holiday where we get presents every night for eight nights to celebrate the festival of lights."
"Wow, I wish we got that!" John exclaimed. The next day on the way to school John runs up to Stan, curious to see what he got. He sees that Stan is upset, "What's wrong? Where's your present from last night?" asks John.
Stan holds up a ball of crumpled wrapping paper, "It was leftovers night."
___________________________________________________________
My mother once gave me two sweaters for Hanukkah. The next time we visited, I made sure to wear one.
As we entered her home, instead of the expected smile, she said, "What's the matter? You didn't, like the other one?"
___________________________________________________________
Dear Darling Son and That Person You Married,
Happy Chanukah to you, and please don't worry. I'm just fine considering I can't breathe or eat. The important thing is that you have a nice holiday, thousands of miles away from your ailing mother. I've sent along my last ten dollars in this card, which I hope you'll spend on my grandchildren. G-d knows their mother never buys them anything nice. They look so thin in their pictures, poor babies.
Thank you so much for the birthday flowers, dear boy. I put them in the freezer so they'll stay fresh for my grave. Which reminds me -- we buried Grandma last week. I know she died years ago, but I got to yearning for a good funeral, so Aunt Berta and I dug her up and had the services all over again. I would have invited you, but I know that woman you live with would have never let you come. I bet she's never even watched that videotape of my hemorrhoid surgery, has she?
Well son, it's time for me to crawl off to bed now. I lost my cane beating off muggers last week, but don't you worry about me. I'm also getting used to the cold since they turned my heat off and am grateful because the frost on my bed numbs the constant pain. Now don't you even think about sending any more money, because I know you need it for those expensive family vacations you take every year. Give my love to my darling grand-babies and my regards to whatever-her-name-is -- the one with the black roots who stole you screaming from my bosom.
Happy Chanukah,
Inside jokes are personal jokes between friends that only those people can understand.
Don't seat on me
You can find some good hospital jokes online at Great Clean Jokes. One hospital joke is " What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? At a mental hospital you have to show improvement to get out."
Ones that are toad often.
what I usually do is I go on the internet and i types in : "what are some good jokes?" and some good jokes will most deffenitly come up. hope this helps you little buddy. p.s. sometimes you can just think of good jokes (that you made up) on the top of your head. Example: what did the mother beaver say to the baby beaver when he cam home? Shut the dam door !
Anything you want. There are no traditional drinks for Hanukkah.
Since jokes are subjective and jokes only if you think they are, I can only provide what amuses me: The joke's on you.
Inside jokes are personal jokes between friends that only those people can understand.
The oldest
Some good family friendly jokes in Hindi can be found on many different websites online. A couple of those websites are Jokes Duniya and Waffa. Some of the jokes are called Jokes in Hindi, Pathan Joke Zabardast and Bond Meets a Tamil Guy.
Goodjokes.com jokes.com funnyjokes.com anitjokes.com google.com, then type in jokes
Did you eat the baby
Don't seat on me
I'm an orange!
funny jokes in the app section through your smart phone
You can find some good hospital jokes online at Great Clean Jokes. One hospital joke is " What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? At a mental hospital you have to show improvement to get out."
There are several websites that good chemistry jokes can be obtained from. Among them are About, Jupiter Scientific, Jokes 4 Us, Angelo, and Chemical Forums.