Answer:
== lofty ==
* does the crew live onboard?
* one port, can I return it in the next?
* If I guaranteed an ocean view cabin, why am I looking at a parking lot? (''the ship is still in port'')
* What time is the 'midnight buffet'?
* How far 'are we' above sea level? (''This really depends on what deck you're standing on.'' )
* How do I get off the ship?
* Is the water in the toilets fresh or salt water?
* "You mean I have to pay for tours?"
* "Are the elevators wheelchair accessible?"
* "Do the stairs go up AND down?"
* "What side of the 'boat' do the whales come up on?"
* "What cable TV system does the ship subscribe to?"
* "Is that island surrounded by water? "
* "What do you do with the ice sculptures after they melt?"
* "Do I have to stay up until 2 a.m. to change my clock forward?"
* [From the Photo Gallery] "How do I know which photos are mine?"
* "Your staff are rude... How come the taxi driver didn't speak English!?"
* Does the elevator go to the back of the ship?
* Do you generate electricity aboard the ship?