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You have the right to protect your children, legally if need be, from witnessing abusive incidents during their visitations with their dad. Contact your local Child Welfare center or Dept. of Children and Family Services (if you're in the U.S.). Also think about discussing this situation with a lawyer with experience in child custody/visitation, to see if you can arrange to have your children visit their father at another location. It would also be helpful for you, and the young children witnessing the abuse, to seek professional counseling. This early intervention can help prevent future emotional problems, and will provide support for the emotions you are experiencing as an adult. There are many domestic violence counselors, and support groups are often free of charge. Be aware that although children may be nonverbal about their feelings, they are definitely taking in their surroundings. Art Therapy may provide another avenue for expression and understanding. Sometimes talking is "too scary" and clients find talking awkward. Art transcends these boundaries - ask around for a counselor of college providing this additional intervention. Such images created by clients have been successfully used as evidence in court.

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Q: What do you do when your small children visit their father who stays at his daughter's and they see the adults there pick up their 4-year-old son by the front of his shirt and curse and call him names?
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