Why would a Narcissist go crying to a mutual friend you introduced her to complaining you don't talk to her anymore and what should you do so you stop looking like the bad guy?

Answer 1

Talk to the girl that complains about you and ask why she feels that way. If you talk to her about what you are hearing, you can clear this up. Beware of the narcissist! Mine spent 5 years telling people how annoyed with me my neighbors were (I'm in a farming community) & only saw them once a month when they would drop in to say hello or borrow equipment from me. All of the sudden my N would tell me that I'd better go talk to the neighbors because they were really mad at me. It was confusing to me because I am a pleasant hard working person that minds my own business & pays my own way. I never gossiped with the neighbors or said anything personal (the crop weather during harvest time is as deep as it got - literally). After the N moved on, 7 months later I heard he'd been bad-mouthing me for the past 5 years to everyone that wanted to hear. I was walking around wondering why my neighbors didn't 'like' me (as the N contantly reported - it was his N handiwork! - I feel so stupid for not knowing something that was right in front of my face!) Now I've heard so many nasty stories he spread about me to so many different kinds of people & so many different spins on the same old theme. One thing I learned instinctively early on while trying to cope with this N (before I got fed up) was not to 'fight' windmills. You have to ignore the reports the N give you because they are either stupid lies for your ears only OR the clever sneak has run around telling plausible lies & N's are SO convincing that you can never even begin to defend yourself because of the steady, cool, calculating, manipulative way they gently spread the the bad stuff, it's like the tide coming in, slow, steady & will evenutally drown you if you don't get to higher ground. Please listen to everyone else on this list: RUN AWAY & don't bother trying to justify youself or you'll end up looking insane (remember, you don't know if the N actually told people the stuff or if he actually told lies, either way you look like a tool for trying to defend yourself. The good people will come around over time & if they don't they too may be N's themselves feeding off the gossip. Good Luck & run like the wind! --- I always found that if you leave the narcissist alone with people long enough he'll eventually show his true colors. My N slandered my name to people but over time they started to see the cracks in his character and realized it was him that was the game player.